Positive Illusions!
You have decided to kick a bad habit. You are excited and you make a plan. You believe you can do it! You start but you soon discover that something does not work. What happened? Often you are the victim of what is called Positive Illusion!
This week I was in Xiamen running a leadership program for a group of corporate managers. Three months ago, they all attended another leadership program where they embarked on the 30 day challenge and created their own POWER plan identifying ONE habit to create. This week we reviewed their progress (or lack of), and discussed their learnings.
So what had happened?
Many of the participants had not been able to follow their original plans. They were motivated when they started but later they realized that they were not able to stick to their plans.
“Our greatest glory is not in never falling but in rising every time we fall.” – Confucius
In this context, Positive Illusion shows up as the inflated assessment of one’s own abilities and/or unrealistic optimism about the future. Studies have repeatedly shown that many of us have an inflated view of our own abilities. Do you also view yourself as happier, smarter, healthier, luckier, and more skilled than others? Some 80 percent of drivers, for example, think they are better at the wheel than the typical driver and thus less likely to have an accident (and that is without any intake of alcohol).
So what did the participants do when they became victims of their own Positive Illusions? When their plans did not work? They remained focused on the end goal. They kept their goal while they changed their approach. One participant had initially decided to swim 3 times a week very early in the morning. That did not work due to family commitments and instead she has begun to walk in the evenings. She found a different way of achieving her goal of better health. By exercising in the evenings, she was also able to do it with her husband, who was also reporting better health. A real Win-Win!
”When it is obvious that the goals cannot be reached, don’t adjust the goals, adjust the action steps” – Confucius
Other people might have given up. I know a lot of people who will ‘try’ a few things, and when it does not work, they just stop. In this class, the important lesson was that nobody had given up. People were openly sharing and admitting their struggles but they had persisted and moved towards their goals by adjusting the plan and being flexible.
Whether you follow the POWER plan and any other habit kicking/building plan, it’s not going to be a smooth sailing. You will fail at times. Certain things will not work. The point is to get up and move on. Eventually you will find a plan that works for you. Now, that is something to be optimistic about.
Beat It!
Coach Bay
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